The 21 Red Flags to Look For In Your Relationship

It’s important to be aware of potential red flags in any relationship, as they can indicate deeper problems that may not be immediately obvious. In romantic relationships, red flags can be especially concerning, as they may indicate that the person you’re seeing is not who they appear to be.

Here are 21 red flags to look out for in your relationship:

1. Lack of responsibility: If a person frequently blames others for their mistakes, or avoids taking responsibility for their actions, this can be a sign that they are not mature or reliable.
2. Lack of respect: If a person frequently belittles or talks down to you, this can be a sign that they do not respect you or your boundaries.
3. Dishonesty or deceit: If a person is not transparent and truthful in their communication, this can be a sign that they have something to hide.
4. Jealousy and controlling behaviour: If a person is excessively jealous or possessive, this can be a sign that they are insecure and may have difficulty trusting you.
5. Abusive behaviour: If a person has a history of violence or abuse, or if they display signs of aggression or intimidation, it is important to seek help and get out of the situation as soon as possible.
6. Lack of empathy: If a person is not able to understand and share the feelings of others, this can be a sign that they may struggle with connecting on a deeper level.
7. Inability to communicate: If a person struggles to express themselves effectively, or avoids communication altogether, this can be a sign that they may struggle with intimacy.
8. Lack of interest in your life: If a person seems disinterested in your hobbies, interests, or goals, this can be a sign that they may not be invested in the relationship.
9. Inconsistency: If a person’s behaviour or attitudes are inconsistent or changeable, it can be difficult to trust and predict how they will act in the future
10. Lack of commitment: If a person seems to be constantly dodging commitments or making excuses, this can also indicate a lack of responsibility.
11. Self-centredness: If a person is overly self-centred, it can be difficult to build a healthy relationship as they may prioritise their own needs over yours
12. Avoiding responsibility or accountability: If a person avoids taking responsibility or admitting mistakes, it may be difficult to trust them or rely on them in the future
13. Gaslighting or manipulation: If a person tries to make you question your own sanity, memories or decisions, it’s a sign that they may be using manipulative tactics to control the relationship.
14. Lack of boundaries: If a person doesn’t respect your privacy, boundaries, and personal space, it can be a sign that they may be difficult to trust.
15. Lack of interest in your well-being: If a person does not care about your physical, emotional or mental well-being, it is an indication of lack of care in the relationship
16. Projecting his/her own issues on to you: If a person is constantly accusing you of things your partner is guilty of, it’s a sign your partner is not willing to take responsibility for his/her own actions
17. Displays anger easily: if a person’s anger is easy to trigger, it can be a sign of deeper emotional issues
18. Treats others poorly: If a person treats others with disrespect, it is a sign that they may not be capable of treating you any differently.
19. Lack of empathy towards others: if a person is not able to understand or share the feelings of others, it can be a sign that they may struggle with connecting on a deeper level and empathising with your feelings.
20. Prioritises his own needs over yours: If a person prioritises their own needs over yours, it can indicate that they may not be fully invested in the relationship.
21. Infidelity: If a person has a history of cheating or is not transparent about their relationships, it can be a sign that they may not be committed to the relationship and have a lack of trustworthiness.

It’s important to remember that not all red flags are deal-breakers, and every person is different. However, if you notice multiple red flags in a person or if the red flags you notice are particularly concerning, it may be time to re-evaluate the relationship and consider whether it is healthy for you.

It’s always good to trust your intuition and if something doesn’t feel right, it’s best to address it, talk about it and assess the situation. Remember, if you feel uncomfortable or unsafe, seek help and reach out to trusted friends or family members, or if you’re in Sydney, you can speak to one of our counsellors or if you’re in Melbourne consider seeking professional help.