Starting a relationship counselling journey with your partner can be a powerful and transformative experience. It provides an opportunity to explore and address any issues or challenges in the relationship, and to work towards building a stronger and more fulfilling connection. However, before embarking on this journey, it’s important to have open and honest discussions with your partner to ensure that you are both on the same page and committed to the process.
To help guide these conversations, here are the top 10 questions to ask your partner before starting relationship counselling.
- What do you hope to gain from relationship counselling? It’s important to have clear expectations and goals for the counselling process. Knowing what your partner hopes to achieve can help set the tone for the counselling and ensure that both parties are on the same page.
- What are your biggest concerns or issues in our relationship? It’s essential to address any problems or concerns head-on in order to move forward in a positive direction. By discussing these issues openly, both partners can work together to find solutions and improve the relationship.
- How do you define a healthy relationship, and what are your non-negotiables? Different people have different ideas of what constitutes a healthy relationship. It’s important to understand each other’s definitions and to identify any non-negotiable values or boundaries.
- How do you communicate, and how can we improve our communication? Communication is a crucial aspect of any relationship. By understanding each other’s communication styles and identifying areas for improvement, both partners can work towards more effective communication.
- How do you handle conflict, and how can we improve our conflict resolution skills? It’s inevitable that conflicts will arise in any relationship. By discussing how each partner handles conflict and identifying areas for improvement, both partners can work towards more productive and healthy resolution of conflicts.
- How do you express love and affection, and how do you prefer to receive it? Different people have different ways of expressing and receiving love and affection. It’s important to understand each other’s preferences and to find ways to express love and affection in a way that feels meaningful to both partners.
- How do you manage stress and support each other during difficult times? Stress and difficult times are a natural part of life, and it’s important for both partners to be able to support each other through these challenges. By discussing how each partner manages stress and how they can support each other, both partners can work towards building a strong foundation of support and resilience.
- How do you envision our future together, and what steps can we take to get there? It’s important to have a shared vision for the future and to be on the same page about long-term goals. By discussing these issues, both partners can work towards building a future together that aligns with both of their desires and values.
- What are your love languages, and how can we use them to strengthen our relationship? The concept of love languages refers to the ways in which people feel and express love. By understanding each other’s love languages and finding ways to show love and appreciation in a way that resonates with your partner, both partners can work towards a more fulfilling and meaningful relationship.
- How can we continue to grow and develop as a couple, both individually and together? It’s important for both partners to continue growing and developing as individuals and as a couple. By discussing ways to support each other’s personal growth and finding opportunities for shared growth and development, both partners can work towards a strong and thriving relationship.
Overall, these are just a few of the key questions to consider when starting relationship counselling. By having open and honest discussions about these issues, both partners can work towards a stronger and more fulfilling relationship.
- “The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts” by Gary Chapman
- “The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work” by John Gottman
- “Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find – and Keep – Love” by Amir Levine and Rachel S. F. Heller
- Chapman, G. (2015). “The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts.” Northfield Publishing.
- Gottman, J. (2015). “The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work.” Harmony.
- Levine, A., & Heller, R. S. F. (2010). “Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find – and Keep – Love.” Penguin.